Page 104 - NIXBOOK

A superior court judge who lived in town came to our front counter once and discreetly handed me a purple cloth Crown Royal
bag full of (then quite illegal) marijuana that he wanted me to discreetly get rid of for him. He didn’t say where he got it but I
knew it was from his teenage son. Okay, Judge. Sigh..I don’t know why people involve the police like that. Judge! Just throw that
shit away yourself and leave me out of it, or I’m going to have to mention this 25 years later right here!

The old woman who died in the bathtub, getting the water ready for a bath. (actually not an uncommon way to die - when you
get old, beware the bending over the tub move – it can kill you I actually have seen it more than once) Very senile grandpa was
sitting in his old recliner in the living room; with a brain memory on a permanent 60 second erase/reset/loop cycle. Meaning
anything past 60 seconds was pretty much gone from his brain. He had noticed she was freshly dead but kept forgetting. Me
and several other officers got tired of repeating ourselves to the old guy so we decided we could just ignore him, yes it was rude
and disrespectful but he wasn’t going to remember any of it anyway. By the way, the whole house was Frozen in Time: 1978
Edition! Glitter popcorn ceilings, dark wood trim everywhere, brass light fixtures, beige light switch and outlet covers, hideous
green carpet; the works. So there’s me, looking in the kitchen for prescription pill bottles to see how bad off grandma had been
for the old bending over the tub move to finish her off and I find in a kitchen cabinet some old spices and herbs, in little bottles.
Decades old. Literally. Decades old. And there, front and center: an old, sealed box of Jello, dated almost 50 years old. Never
used. Somehow survived 50 years of spring cleanings and holidays and birthday parties..never touched. But still front and center,
surrounded by other ancient unused seasonings. My mind: blown. The other officers present: also minds blown. I did take a
picture of it, but sadly lost it years ago.

Over the course of my career, more than a few of my police investigations and reports were used not only for criminal
prosecutions, but subsequent civil court cases. Some of them ended with plaintiffs being awarded multi-million dollar
settlements for compensation of being wronged by individuals, businesses, and corporations. Usually I knew when I was writing
the report if it was going to be a Big Deal or not; when I knew for sure, I’d make damn sure my finished product was as good as
I could get it.