Page 108 - NIXBOOK

Quiet Sunday morning; a mini mart store clerk called 911 to report a theft. He was pretty worked up. I responded to the gas
station and the agitated clerk told me that a hispanic suspect had purchased some items, but then also.. stole an ice cream bar!
And then had the audacity to litter the wrapper in the parking lot! I asked the clerk how much the ice cream bar cost. “One
dollar fifty nine cents,” he told me. Well good job taking your job seriously, sir! I was tempted to pay for it myself so I wouldn’t
have to investigate it, which I didn’t anyway. Because.. $1.59.

I came across a hilariously cute construction site scene: a new neighborhood was being built and the construction workers got
adopted by the large friendly dog that lived nearby. The dog would not stay out of their construction area so they bought it a
little orange safety vest and every morning they put the vest on him, and then he’d just hang out with them all day. It was pretty
cute.

It’s two hours past midnight, I’m out on patrol and I come across a weirdness that my brain cannot process. It took me a good
10 or 15 long seconds to figure out that what I was seeing was a residential fence that had been run into and over by a drunk
driver passing through. The fence was black vinyl coated chain link, only 3 feet high. About 75 feet of it had been ripped off the
posts from the homeowner’s yard, and dragged into the middle of a residential street, along with some of the posts. Two blocks
away; the drunk driver and his broken car. Again, it just took me the stupidist longest time to figure out the twisted mass in the
roadway was a destroyed fence; my mind could just not compute it right away.

Pro tip: if you try to shoplift liquor from a store, and you stuff the bottle into your pants when the police catch you, it’s not going
to work if you have sweatpants on. For you ladies, hiding things in your bra might work, but if a female officer is present it’s
probably going to be found.