Page 216 - NIXBOOK

Some lady called 911 to report a white van in a grocery store parking lot looked like the kind of a van that somebody could get
abducted in.

Guy in a ratty old Suburban is towing an equally ratty old motorhome trailer; as he goes downhill on a very busy road he realizes
the trailer brakes are kaput; the trailer winds up pushing his truck sideways and everything then goes sideways, and both truck
and trailer end up lodged between the guardrails on both sides of the two lane road, completely blocking 100% of both lanes.
No injuries and no other vehicles were taken out in the process. Road was closed about 2 hours and I had to detour a lot of folks.
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About every 100 car stopped in the middle of my intersection: “excuse me officer, I need to go that way.” THE ROAD. AS YOU
CAN SEE. IS CLOSED. “What happened?” CAR CRASH. “Is everybody okay?” YES. “How do I get to Kingston?” FOLLOW
EVERYBODY ELSE. “I don’t know any other way to get to where I’m going today.” WELL YOU’RE GONNA LEARN TODAY I
GUESS. “Can you tell me how to get to –“ NO! I’M DIRECTING TRAFFIC I CAN’T GIVE YOU DIRECTIONS RIGHT NOW
GOOGLE IT MOVE ALONG YOU ARE HOLDING UP ABOUT EIGHTY CARS BEHIND YOU. Sometimes it is really hard to stay
polite while directing traffic in the hot sun and people want to stop and ask stupid questions, you know?

Shoplifter at WalMart: The police are called and the suspect bolts out the store, with security in hot pursuit. The thief ran across
the parking lot and went downhill through the bushes to the highway. Crossed 2 lanes, the median, 2 more lanes, and then
jumped a fence into a residential neighborhood. By that time the two police officers on duty are pretty close; he can see it’s not
safe to continue through to the front yard so he jumped a side fence into another yard. And then another fence, into another
side yard. Going up over the fences, he could see he had about another 20 more fences to go. He was pretty tired at that point,
so he decided to give up. Myself and another officer tackled him before he could change his mind.

A guy called 911 to report his nice new giant SUV had been stolen again. Turns out the thief was his 12 year old son. Dad declined
to press charges; he said he’d take care of it himself.