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Autistic kid ran away from home and his mother freaked out, thinking he was suicidal. He hadn’t gone far though; he actually
was just hiding in the tv cabinet. That was not the first time I had responded to a missing kid who was in fact just hiding in the
house somewhere.

The scene is the Port of Poulsbo boater’s laundry room: A woman is freaking the fuck out because some guy took her laundry
out of the dryer after it was dry, so he could use it for his wet clothes. When she found out, there was a confrontation and a
slight scuffle, which we eventually worked out without criminal charges because both of them were being stupid in the moment.
Of note in this story; she was white, he wasn’t. Right after I go there the man pulled me aside and produced, of all things, a race
card: “You know why she did that officer? She’s trying to exert her white privilege over me!”

The millennial loser who still lived at home with no job. “What grade did you drop out of school?” I asked him. “Uh..8th grade.”
“What have you been doing then for the past seven years?” I asked. His reply: “Uh,…nothing.” Not entirely a true statement: he
had managed to successfully drain his parent’s bank account over the course of a few years to fuel his heroin addiction. When
dad finally looked at the bank account, close to $50,000 dollars were long gone. Mom had a clue, though, but didn’t want to deal
with any of it while it was happening.

The crazy man who alarmed his neighbors by taking all of his expensive electronics out into his driveway and smashing them
all to pieces with a sledgehammer. (not illegal) The next day, a big yard sale where everything else –including the full set of his
golf clubs – was all free. (also not illegal) Yep, he was quite mentally ill. (also..not illegal)