Page 232 - NIXBOOK

The man upset that a sawed-off tree branch was on the sidewalk in front of his house. It was from his tree, but it had been
hanging over his fence onto the neighbor’s property so he understood the neighbor had the right to cut it. But he didn’t want
the branch back in front of his house. He wanted me to yell at the neighbor to move the branch. Those two idiots had been
going back and forth for years over stupid things like that and I was sick and tired of it. I didn’t want to talk to the other neighbor
so my solution was to remove the offending branch myself by dragging it down the street about a block and then I threw it into
the woods. The complainant was then very upset with me for not yelling at his neighbor. I pointed out to him that I had just
solved his problem. He was of course thwarted and now even more pissed. I sweetly told him that if it ever happened again then
he could just call me again and I’d solve it again for him. Guess who never called again after that?!?

The guy I took into custody and booked into the jail. Something was not quite right about him so I made the run to the jail in a
record short time, doing literally 90 mph on the highway. At intake he decided he wanted to fight the corrections officers. They
had to pig pile him and toss him into a rubber room. The sergeant who came out last made a face and told me “He just shit his
pants..!” Yep, I was really glad I had been driving fast to minimize the time he had been in my patrol car.

The one about the local catholic priest who performed an impromptu and unwanted exorcism on an office secretary/church
staff member. It upset her greatly..but I didn’t see what the fuss was about..why complain about a priest trying to rid you of
demons? The really memorable part for me though was that the priest then lied to my face and denied it all.