Page 197 - NIXBOOK

Disheveled, smelly, mentally ill homeless cat lady, living downtown, was shlepping around 3 poor cats in a couple of cat carriers.
I called Animal Control and using a combination of sweet talk and coercion, we talked the woman out of her cats, so they could
go live normal cat lives somewhere else. I was feeling pretty good about the outcome. The next morning, the homeless woman
th
was back in our police station lobby, holding a 4 fucking cat she had found somewhere after we had de-catted her just the day
before. Animal control then took that one away, too. That woman was like a cat magnet. Or a cat snatcher. Or both.

A citizen reported finding some bones in the dirt. Bones that looked suspiciously human. I went to the scene; a dirt embankment
overlooking the bay, in a city park. Erosion had exposed a few bones that we then dug out; they had clearly been there for years
and years. I sent the bones off to a medical examiner at the University of Washington who specialized in old bones. It was
determined the bones were definitely human and had indeed been in the dirt for around a 100 years old. Nobody could determine
the race, and the bones were kept in a drawer at the U of W until about 20 years later when some researchers came back making
inquiries. Fortunately for them I was on duty that day and was able to show them the exact location. They determined the dirt
was not a burial site; the dirt had been moved from somewhere else and the bones had been included when the dirt was dumped
there.

Store security guard caught a shoplifter. The shoplifter didn’t want to get caught so he ran out of the store, chased by security
guard. The thief ran into the woods and got away. Police get called. I look around a bit in the woods but the guy is gone. Then
a helpful citizen tells us that the she had seen that guy when he had arrived, and she pointed out his truck to us. Turns out the
registered owner of the car was, yep, the suspect. Here’s the best part; the thief had left his keys in the ignition, and the doors
were unlocked. The security guard wanted me to get into the truck but legally I couldn’t. But I suggested that if he, as an agent
and goodwill ambassador of the store, wanted to take the keys for safekeeping into his office, he could do that. Because there
were criminals running around! You can’t just leave some poor customer’s car keys all vulnerable like that in a car! So the guard
eagerly took them, and then locked the car to keep it safe. I helpfully gave him the phone number for the owner, and the guard
left him a fabulous message, letting him know that hey, he’s got his keys safe in his office, and he can come get them anytime.