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Statement I heard after pulling over a traffic violator and asking what his driving record was like: “I don’t usually get caught.”

A domicle challenged weirdo was in a city park, weirding people out. I went in on foot and eventually found his tent nestled
under some trees, but weirdo was MIA. A short while later I came across another park visitor, there with his family. He was the
one who had called 911 to have a nice police officer stop by and check things out. The nice man, there with his family, was not
going to leave the park just because there was a weirdo there, so his plan was to call 911 and arm himself with a 4 foot section of
rebar he had somehow found. “If that weirdo wants to start anything with me, I’m ready to give him a rebar sandwich,” the man
told me. I spent almost an hour looking for the weirdo so I could tell him where to avoid getting a rebar sandwich, but I think
he had wandered out of the park at that time.

Bad car crash on the highway. The driver-turned-patient needed a helicopter ride across Puget Sound to Harborview Hospital
ASAP. This was back in the 1990’s, before a private air ambulance service existed, so the helicopter that responded was an olive-
drab green military Bell Huey, staffed with combat medics from Fort Lewis. The WSP troopers and I shut down traffic on the
highway and the helicopter landed right on the roadway next to the crashed cars, loaded up the patient, and took off again.