Page 305 - NIXBOOK

I’m in a woman’s apartment. She’s a professional full-time drunkard with a blood alcohol content so high that when she passes
out too much and can’t get in her normal daily intake of several bottles of vodka the delirium tremens start up, which in her
th
case always included severe diarrhea, not limited to the bathroom. This is about the 8 time I’ve had to go check on her, and
every time ended with her going away in an aid car for treatment. I’m quite disappointed because she had completely ruined
the carpet of her new apartment, just like the carpet in her previous apartment that she got kicked out of. I’m disappointed
because her new landlord clearly did not do a very good background check on her and now he was going to have get new
carpeting and he was a good guy and didn’t deserve that, even though he did neglect to do the background check on her.

Shoplifter went into a hardware store and stole, of all things, a large hydraulic tire jack. Store employees noticed when he walked
out with a bulge in jacket. Then he did the most colossal dumb thing; he put the jack in his car, and then came back into the
store and continued to look around. The manager went out to the guys truck, saw the stolen merchandise in there, and called
the police. I showed up and met the manager outside. I told him that I was not legally allowed to get into the truck, even though
I could clearly see the stolen jack. But I would not stop the manager from looking, so he opened the door and scanned the
merchandise with his portable checkout scanner, and of course it matched the missing inventory in the store, so I went back
inside and arrested the guy. He got called in to court a month later, and made some deals for continuances and deferments; and
a whole year later he was still showing up to court at regular intervals, dealing with his own stupidness.

Dead guy apartment: dead guy is still present, having just died in his Depends and nothing else, sitting upright on his couch,
still holding onto his walker, if that paints enough of a picture for you. He had lived there for about 30 years; he was in fact the
only one to ever live in that unit, having moved in right after it was built. He had decorated the interior with some really bad
décor back then, and had left it all up there for 30 years while he smoked his life away. I caught a glimpse of a picture hanging
on the wall slightly askew, showing a different color under where it used to hang. In this case, white instead of brownish yellow.
So I went over to the couch and removed one of the paintings, a hideous cowboy painting that would have been outdated by
1978. The square patch of wall behind the painting: pristine white. The rest the of the wall; brownish yellow. Yep, the guy had
been a heavy non-stop smoker and there was exhibit B. (exhibit A was the dead guy himself). The coroner was so impressed he
photographed the discolored wall; as it clearly showed what the guys’ main hobby had been.

One night around midnight a guy called 911 to report his buddy was suddenly missing; they were a couple of hobos walking
through town, and when they got to an intersection the missing guy disappeared without a trace. I responded along with a fire
and aid crew since the buddy had apparently jumped off the highway down a near-vertical embankment near a creek and culvert;
we looked all over in the bushes and creek but never found the guy. I suspect he was getting tired of his walking partner and
decided to ditch him. Or maybe he wasn’t even real to begin with.